Notes From the End of 2024 and the Beginning of 2025
Rebranding, and other things...
First of all, I want to send a special thank you to my paid subscribers (and no, it’s not the photo above - the photo above is how I sent off 2024)! I’ve had a few new recent paid subscribers as well as a couple that have renewed their subscription for a second year! It’s amazing how those subscriptions have hit at perfect times for me financially. You have no idea how much that helps, and how much I appreciate that! I also really appreciate all of you who have stuck around even though I haven’t been as productive over the past year. Once again, I am hoping to get my shit together better this year and make a schedule- and stick to it!
I’m starting off my first post of the new year with rebranding, so you will notice the name change from “The Dame of Disarray” to “All the Things She Said.” A couple of years ago, I added a podcast here with that name. My plan for that podcast was to do episodes on music. I had been thinking about music lyrics or song titles for the name, and that one came into my mind, and once that one landed, nothing else came. (I’m hoping to finally start that podcast this year as well!)
I have been wanting to rename this newsletter something that more incorporates the topics I write about. The funny thing is that one day a few months ago, while I was trying to think of potential names, “All the Things She Said” once again came to mind. *If you don’t know, it’s the title of a Simple Minds song.
The very next morning, my daughter played a song called “All the Things She Said” by t.A.T.u.
If that wasn’t a sign… But, I don’t always take the advice of signs, so I held out a bit to see if anything else came to mind. When things get stuck in my brain, they don’t give easily. Without being specific, it does encompass the topics I will most likely be writing about: a variety of things…all the things! Parenting, mental health, (hopefully some humor), music, streaming/television shows, and films. So, I guess it’s sticking.
2024 was not a great year. (Thus, the photo above gives it a final salute.)
Probably not the worst ever. But, it has to be close.
I wrote that much on New Year’s Eve while waiting for the three younger kids to get ready to take them to their dad’s. It was my year for Christmas Eve, and his year for New Year’s Eve.
But, I’m going to back up a bit and give kudos to that week between Christmas and the New Year. It was a nice relaxed week with the kids. They were mine from 12/27-1/3 (aside from New Year’s Eve). I mean, they are always mine, but I got to enjoy them without the pressures of school and work.
When the younger three got back from their dad’s that Friday after Christmas, the boys came wearing their Christmas gift from their paternal grandmother. “Frybread Power” hoodies (along with the Smoke Signals (1998) DVD).
We were already planning a family movie night (to start The Lord of the Rings trilogy), so we watched Smoke Signals (1998) instead. I am surprised that I hadn’t thought to watch this movie with them before. It’s one of my favorites, and I’m a huge fan of Sherman Alexie’s work. I could go off on a huge sidetrack here (I actually wrote my English Honors Thesis on Alexie’s work back in 1999-2000). I will spare you all those details. But, I have to tell you about the time I discovered he was on Substack! See the footnote.1
The kids LOVED the movie! I told them that it was based on a short story (as well as elements from multiple stories in the collection, The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven). I ordered two copies of the book. One I sent with my oldest (back to college), and one for the others to share (I have my own copy somewhere in a box in storage, but it is surely highlighted and annotated all over). The biggest talk after the movie centered on Fry Bread! So, of course, this had to happen!
“Aunt Terry Anne made the best fry bread,” said my middle son. She did. My son talked about the time last year when they went to the reservation with their dad for a wake. It was their first time back there since we moved to Iowa in 2014. Terry Anne made the fry bread for the feast after the wake. The world lost her this past November. I told the kids stories about her from when they were little, and she would visit us. She was one of my favorite people for so many reasons. Today, weeks later, my middle son is still talking about Aunt Terry Anne’s fry bread.
I clearly wasn’t using enough lard. Definitely out of practice. But, that didn’t stop the kids from devouring it as soon as it came out of the pan and cooled just enough for them to grab.
We managed to watch The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) the day before New Year’s Eve, then the other two Wednesday and Thursday that week. It was my one plan over the break, and we did it! The extended versions of course!
On New Year’s Eve, my oldest and I met one of my best friends at a brewery restaurant to start our celebration with a nice dinner. We had run into a brewer and brewer/part owner of Twin Span Brewing at our local Sunday meet-up brewery (Wake Brewing). My friend was talking about their pumpkin beer, and they were down to the last keg, so the brewer said he would save some for her.
What I LOVE about the brewing community here is that you will see brewers and owners frequenting each other’s establishments. It’s a very friendly and collaborative community.
We had a great dinner with some amazing beers. My oldest had root beer since he’s only 19. The brewer was tending the bar that night, so when we were finished eating, he offered to give us a tour of the brewery.
While he was giving us the tour, he explained the process as well.
As he was explaining the process, it occurred to me that out of all the brewery interviews we did while writing the Quad Cities Beer: A History book, not one of the breweries gave us a tour like that. Most of them showed us their brewery and equipment, but none of them took us through the process step by step with each piece (that I can remember). We had different brewers or bartenders explain different steps of the process, and used those explanations for the book along with a graphic my co-writer found from some German group online (and got their permission to use) and pictures we had taken of the equipment at some of the local breweries.
My oldest and I, along with some of my best friends, sent 2024 packing at a party hosted by one of those best friends, where we ate appetizers, dips and chips, and watched some of the best and cheesiest late 70s/early 80s music films (Xanadu (1980), Rock & Roll High School (1979), and Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (1978)).
I was optimistic for 2025. When I first started drafting this post, I titled it “Good Riddance 2024!” With a subtitle of, “Hello 2025, please be good to me!” *I don’t know why I thought I would finish a post in a day or two. Hahahaha!!*
Then on January 1st, 2025, I woke up with vertigo. When I got up and the room was spinning, I forced myself to go back to sleep - thinking it was because I had been up super late, and had quite a bit to drink. Once I got up, it got better and pretty much went away. My oldest and I joined our friends for a New Year’s Day celebration that included Black-Eyed Pea Soup, which is supposed to bring you luck.
The next morning, I woke up with the same spinning. Again, it mostly went away as I went on with my day…. The next morning, the same thing happened… Then, on Saturday morning, when I got up and the room was spinning, it only got worse. It got so bad that I couldn’t bend over, look up, move fast, walk down the stairs, or down the hall without thinking I was going to fall over or pass out. I had never experienced anything like that. When I got nauseous and started vomiting, I texted my friend to see if she would take me to the clinic. The clinic was closed, so we ended up going to the ER. The car ride made it so much worse, I didn’t even think I was going to make it to the ER. I was glad that I had texted her instead of driving myself as I had planned.
Long, boring story short: After the CT scan and MRI both showed nothing concerning, and after spending almost two whole days in the hospital, they sent a physical therapist to assess me and give me a treatment for Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo (BPPV). I’m pretty sure that’s what was going on. It happens when the “rocks” in your head get out of place for whatever reason. So, of course, my rocks got out of whack! I say I’m pretty sure that was it because part of the treatment is to hold your head a certain way and lay down, keeping your head like that on one side - and the first side she laid me on, when I sat up, the spinning got a ton worse. Thankfully, my oldest was home to take care of the dogs (and thankfully, the other kids were with their dad), and my friend was able to go help him feed my birds, which can be challenging.
So, I pretty much spent the first two weeks of 2025 with the world spinning and not being able to drive anywhere. My youngest sister came and took me to my follow-up appointment and helped me run errands, get prescriptions, etc.…
I think my favorite part of that story, aside from the rocks in my head coming loose, was what my dog did when I got home from spending almost two days in the hospital. I took my dirty socks out of the “personal belongings” bag I brought home and put the socks on the kitchen floor. The first time I let the dogs out after getting home, my male dog, Snoopy, snatched one of them up on the way outside. He ran fast all the way out to the end of the yard, dropped the sock, and peed on it while staring right at me.
Up until Saturday (1/4) and the hospital stint, I had a lot of optimism for 2025. So, I did a bit of laughing in the hospital when I realized that it all had started on the first day of the new year… It was 2025’s way of saying, “Better luck next year! This one isn’t it!”
A few weeks in, and if January ever ends, I am back to feeling a little bit of that optimism. I have a few things in the works that may come to fruition. I plan on kicking my ass and sitting down to make a schedule for writing. It’s what makes me sane and is my version of self-care. It has taken a lot of therapy to figure out that I NEED to make time for the things that help me stay connected to myself and others (that’s just the short version).
For starters, I’m planning on publishing a piece about music every Wednesday. So, look for that first piece this Wednesday on one of my most favorite bands, Daughter. I’ve been working on it over the past week, but I promised myself I would finish this update piece first! I am looking at publishing something every Friday or Saturday that is more personal/mental health/parenting related.
Thank you for sticking around! I hope your 2025 started better than mine!
I usually comment on a lot of the music Substacks that I read, and I get email notifications when someone likes one of my comments. One day, a couple of years ago, I got an email that said, “Sherman Alexie liked your comment on xxx.” I had to do a double take, then a triple take, then investigate. Then fangirl tf out when it turned out it was THE Sherman Alexie reading and commenting on the same music Substack! Of course, I immediately subscribed to his Substack.